About the Author(s)
Malik Najeeb
Author is a fourth-year BS Law student at the University of Peshawar, is a perceptive writer with a keen eye for societal issues. His articles delve into the often-overlooked problems that significantly impact our society, bringing attention to critical issues that might otherwise go unnoticed.
This might offend some of you but this is our society and it is we men who are responsible for this ruthless society. It’s easy to say, a man is a leader of a house. But this statement is many times misinterpreted and misunderstood. Because of this misinterpretation, 90% of women don’t get a chance to prove themselves. Let’s discuss a typical household under a man’s supervision. An ordinary man in that house is in relation with four kinds of women, a daughter, a sister, a wife, and a mother.
A daughter and sister are the initial stages of a girl. A girl at this stage needs a lot of attention and care but what she experiences is anger and strictness of her father and brother. No one knows why they try to prove their superiority by expressing rage. They want everything to be perfect like an army commander without knowing the circumstances. They want their daughter and sister to fear them and to remain silent in front of them. Because of this trait, the innocent daughter and sister remain silent for her life trying to figure out what their mistake was.
And, loses credibility with her father and brother, never asks for their help in any problem she faces, and always tries to figure it out on her own because she knows if she shares any problem with them then they will find an extreme solution for it.
Suppose a girl was being harassed on her way to college. She kept ignoring him but it kept on going for a full week now she was left with no other choice but to face him and imagine an innocent girl facing a gangsta guy. She went all through this but never shared anything with her family because she knew if her father and brother were aware of it then they would have taken an extreme step like they would make her quit education and force her to get married to an unknown guy. God forbids if something bad had happened as a result of that incident then there might be a possibility that she would have been killed in the name of honor.
This is our patriarchal society where the feelings and emotions of men are accepted and respected but on the other hand feelings of women are given no respect and girls are restricted from expressing any of such feelings in front of men and in many cases, women are considered just a burden which they are suppose to bear until their marriage.
Same is the case with a wife when this girl reaches the stage of a wife and marries a man a husband who again wants her to be a perfect housekeeper. He needs a wife who can take care of her parents, her siblings, and the house in which she is living and at last, takes care of him which is her real responsibility, he desires a perfect slave instead of a wife. This husband is well aware of everyone but rarely considers her emotional well-being or health. Shockingly malnutrition remains a grave issue in Pakistan and women like her suffer the consequences. Because she ensures everyone stays happy but no one ever asks about her happiness.
A time comes when this wife becomes a mother, with the responsibility of countless children. Due to all of this hustle and chaos in the house, she never gets time to nurture her children perfectly, which is her utmost responsibility. At this stage, the whole society collapses. because the children who were supposed to be the future of the country are now the byproduct of this ruthless society. It is in the hands of a man to form a happy society. Allah has given men a great power which is the power of decision making and upon their decisions lies the future of women.
Allah has given men superiority over women; Allah has made men head of the household and being head of the house never means only to fulfill financial needs because the head is one who looks from all sides, he is also responsible for understanding the feelings and emotions of women living in the house and to be with them whenever they need you.
It is a total myth that a woman can survive alone, she always needs someone to support her.
A Hadith teaches us:
“Treat women kindly for women are created from the bent rib”
If you try to be harsh with them you would lose them.
I know you may disagree with me and it’s your right.
